“Do Clothes Make the Woman?”- Melissa Mankarious
1) Why do you think some lesbian women are reluctant to identify as butch/femme when they are already perceived to be so?
2) The author states that many women cared less about clothes and presentation as they grew older due to feeling more secure in their identities. What changes do you think made these women feel more secure in their identities? Does this say anything about younger butch/femme identifying women that still find clothes and presentation important?
3) Rachel Becker dressed butch on Prom Nite to attract other women and get the response she wanted. Was this due to her ability to act butch or was it the essence she had?
4) What do you think about the idea that some lesbian women cannot pull off being butch/femme because it doesn’t come naturally or they don’t “have it”? Could this create any problems for those lesbian women?
5) Why do you think occasionally dressing up as butch/femme is so powerful for some lesbian women?
1) I don’t think reluctant is the right word here. Despite other people’s perceptions, a person's gender expression/identity is their own and regardless if someone thinks someone is femme or butch it does not mean that they feel that way or are. They may present a certain way and act another way entirely, or their expression may change regularly. Personally, I tend to be perceived as a femme lesbian because I wear my hair long and like feminine styled clothing and makeup; however, I have days when I feel hyper masculine and some days when I feel very feminine. I don’t feel reluctant to label myself femme, rather, I feel it is a term that doesn’t encompass me as a whole, despite other people’s interpretations of me.
ReplyDelete2) I think that the idea that security in one's self identification is a piece of it and finding what works for you, what is comfortable, and what really shows who you are plays a part as well. I think the older women might have been less concerned with pairing, say a masculine looking blazer with a feminine pant for the prom or something because they may be more focused on expressing themselves more realistically, or wearing clothing that fits their bodies well. While some younger lesbians may subscribe to more butch or femme styles of clothing, it does not mean that they are less secure with their gender identities.
3) It seemed as if she was playing a role (not that that’s how she would have normally dressed or acted, just that she was participating in an expectation of gender performance) and, in that role, she found a freedom to express herself in ways she wouldn’t normally. So while she was successful in “acting” butch, she also did exude a certain essence that other women were able to recognize and act on as well.
4) I think this is an outdated presumption of the idea of butch and femme. Gender expression is constantly in fluxuation and I think it is very common for people to be more experimental and fluid with their gender expression whether they feel they can pull something off or not. A personal example of this is my wife is commonly perceived as a butch lesbian (she’s actually a gender-queer pansexual, but that’s another can of worms) and yet she wore a beautiful, traditional style wedding dress when we got married, despite most of the guests having never seen her in a dress before. She chose to wear a dress because she wanted to feel like a bride, she’s not normally comfortable in dresses, but that day was different for her, she felt the only way she would be comfortable was if she dressed feminine.
5) First, I’d like to point out that dressing in a butch or femme fashion is some people’s constant and they do identify as butch or femme lesbians, I felt like the reading was slightly misleading in addressing this, possibly because it is, in my opinion, very outdated. However, I think dressing in anything that you would not normally wear can give anyone a sense of power because it allows you to be someone you aren’t. You can ignore societal constraints and be the person you are in that moment.
1. I think that the reluctance comes from the feeling that you dont fit perfectly into a box, so you arent able to label yourself. You know all of the ways in which you yourself vary across the spectrums, so labeling yourself and confining yourself is hard to do.
ReplyDelete2. I think that as we age, women start to care less about how others percieve them. I come to recognize that we can not meet others exectations and the venture to do so is tiresome, so we stop trying. We start to be more confident in how we view ourselves and place more value in that than what others thnk about us. I think that young lesbians who strive to embody the perfect gender presentation, are no different from hedeosexual young women who strive to be what men find desirable to fulfill the image of beauty that has been impressed upon them.
3. I belive that she felt confined by her appearance and became empowered by changing her appearance to one which she felt was more assertive. She felt that her appearance had brought out qualities within her that she could not express in her typical dress.
4. I think the idea relates to all women, not just lesbians. The demand for women to be extremely feminine (by classic standards) has deminished as the ideology of feminine and masculine have mingled and converged. Style and fashion have evolved to where styles which have previously been viewed s masculine, are now femanine trends. I think that in some ways, a persons personality may hinder them from fully being able to embody the look. Some women are too soft for certain styles to look natural, while others are too harsh for softer looks for look natural. your personality also affects if you will be comfortable in the style, which adds or diminishes to your ability to look natural. The complexity of the situatuion is likely compounded by the additional cultural constraints put on lesbians, by their additional identity.
5. I think it would be empowering to experiance what others experience on a daily basis, to see how small changes such as clothing and hairstyle can greatly impact hoe other view you and how you view yourself.
1. I think that lesbian women are reluctant to identify themselves as butch/femme when they are already perceived as such because a persons self-reflection is there own and is by no mean a fixed identity, thus there's no reason to fit into a societal role or label.
ReplyDelete2. I think that as women age, we learn to be more self aware of our mind, body, and spirit. And as we naturally become more comfortable with our own self, we tend to be less fixated on an outside perception of us and therefore care less about a certain clothes, styles, and roles. As women grow secure in their new found identities, they care more about comfort than presentation.
3. I believe that both, her ability to act butch and the new essence she had wile playing this role resulted in the response she wanted because this new role allowed her to bring out a desired assertiveness in her that she did not normally feel comfortable expressing.
4. I believe that this statement creates problems because no woman should be forced into any fixed gender roles, including her style of choice and self expression. There is fluidity in everything and a women can pull off anything she feels comfortable in. And that choice of comfort can vary drastically from day to day.
5. I believe that it is empowering to occasionally change your style because it allows you to be someone different for a day. It allows you to have the confidence to do certain things you wouldn't normally do, but secretly wish you could do.
1. I think some lesbian do not like to contradict how other women see them so that may be a reason why they do not identify as either butch/femme. I also think that another reason why some lesbian will not label themselves is because maybe they are unsure if they really are either butch or femme and since they may not know, they do not want to confirm this even if others see them as either butch/ femme.
ReplyDelete2. I think as people age they become more comfortable with themselves and after years of experience they tend to have an idea of who they really are and so they feel less of a need to let other people know what they are all really about. Whereas, younger people tend to still be figuring themselves out and so they believe gender performance and clothes make a big impact on how other people might see them.
3. I think Rachel Becker's appearance and behavior during Prom Nite was crucial in attracting the women she wanted. I think that a person's essence in many ways can actually sell the look of a person so I think it was a combination of her dress and attitude that got her the attention and not so much her ability to be a proper butch lesbian.
4. I think this idea of not naturally fitting into the butch/femme look among lesbians is in the end just another tactic for women to tear down other women. So this idea that some lesbians should not try to present either butch/ femme because it does not fit them is a little ridiculous. However, I do think this idea of fitting either butch or femme roles does pose a problem for some lesbians because it limits their potential to express themselves fully amongst other lesbians.
5.I think that for some lesbians it can be empowering to break their occasional butch/femme dress and to cross over into either one because it lets them engage in a kind of behavior and mindset they may not be used to. It may even be liberating to change up their look or behavior as it can allow some of them to see that maybe they like the other side better than the one they are usually on.
ReplyDeleteI think that some lesbian women are not quick to jump at the thought of being perceived as either butch or femme because these labels are very constricting. I think it is important to understand that all individuals, no matter how they identify as far as gender or sexuality, are unique. This may seem cliche, but I think that really could limit a person from “conforming” to either butch/femme, and just because the rest of the world perceives them as one or the other does not mean they must agree.
I think we all go through immense changes throughout our lifetime, and our younger years are definitely more difficult because you are still trying to figure out who you are. I think if we generalize this question it can be easily understood as simply growing up and becoming more confident in who you are because you realize what is really important. When you’re younger I think being accepted and well-liked by others is a high priority. Once you’re older you may already have a solid set of friendships or relationships that matter to you, so you’re not as worried about being the person that everyone likes.
I think it was the essence. As the author writes, being butch or femme or anything else can be dressed up or down with clohes and accessories or whatever else, but it’s not what you wear but who you are.
I am sure that this may cause problems with their perceptions of themselves, or their lack of self-confidence in their own self-image. I think this is again all a part of the difficult journey of finding yourself, and being happy with who you are.
I think it is a way to control how others perceive you, and the ability to be flexible and vary that image must be freeing. I think people are often put into a category in their gender identity by society, so being able to switch that up must be empowering.
1. I think it is more that they do not want to have to be totally one or the other. They most likely want the freedom of not having to fit into the stereotyped boxes that society has created for them.
ReplyDelete2. They probably get so used to societies judgement that they have learned to not care and only dress for themselves. They no longer focus on what other people might say about how they dress. The younger women aren't as used to this so they still try to please everyone around them, dressing how they think society wants them to.
3. I think it was more the essence. She was trying something new and, from her reaction, she was surprised at how freeing her choices felt after.
4. I think this is something that has or needs to fade away like so many societal ideas and stereotypes do. The idea that these women need to be one or the other and do not have a choice in which or both is similar to the old fashioned thoughts that women should not be allowed to wear pants. If the woman feels like being butch or femme, it should be her choice, not whether she can "pull it off" in the perspectives of others. It is just another way to be judged or ridiculed by society.
5. It is their way of breaking out of the mold others expect of them and showing they don't have to neatly follow the norm.
Wrap-up comment: I definitely agree with the comments that lesbians, or anyone else, should not have to fit into a box when it comes to labels. I feel like it can be quite constraining to always go by a label, especially if you are an individual that likes the freedom of changing your gender expression whenever you feel like it. I am not a fan of other women telling others they cannot pull off a type of gender expression or style because it doesn’t seem to come naturally. I also didn't think of it as women tearing other women down, but I can definitely see it being that way too!
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